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Doug invites you behind the office and hands you a joint. "We are breaking so many rules right now, but I seriously do not care. This is some messed up shit." He lights the joint with a shaking hand.
"How is this supposed to help?" you ask nervously. You're a good student and have never seen marijuana before. You even won the D.A.R.E. essay last year and know you should say no to drugs.
"You got any better ideas, man? Like, are you a man? Like, are you my man...I mean like, my friend from fourteen years ago? This is messed up. You've got to be kidding me." Doug rants.
"I wish I were..." you say sheepishly, "I'm sorry."
"Hey, don't be sorry, be stoned..." Doug says inhaling.
About that time, you see a police cruiser drive by very slowly. Doug coughs and does not appear to notice.